December 2012
4 posts
Dec 28th
121 notes
Dec 28th
96 notes
Dec 28th
280 notes
the black stockings you kept smell of wet cigarette torn of lust that you could not keep i have slept inside your fault to have you keep me here
Dec 22nd
September 2012
2 posts
Sep 25th
6,108 notes
Sep 16th
1,427 notes
August 2012
1 post
Aug 27th
815 notes
June 2012
2 posts
Jun 13th
169 notes
suffering in shifts
Jun 11th
May 2012
10 posts
May 26th
2,552 notes
2 tags
May 25th
8 notes
How to tell if I like you:
professional-princess: I send you pictures of my cats and my butt, make you tea and meow at you. 
May 24th
101 notes
May 19th
494 notes
May 18th
254 notes
May 17th
57 notes
May 15th
7,330 notes
May 11th
190 notes
May 7th
1,155 notes
May 2nd
1,283 notes
April 2012
28 posts
Apr 30th
77,007 notes
Apr 30th
5,884 notes
Apr 30th
214 notes
Apr 27th
4,392 notes
Apr 25th
136 notes
Apr 25th
152 notes
Apr 25th
99 notes
Apr 25th
65 notes
Apr 22nd
578 notes
Apr 22nd
45 notes
Apr 22nd
286 notes
Apr 21st
5,168 notes
Apr 20th
20,045 notes
Apr 17th
788 notes
Apr 17th
4,844 notes
Apr 17th
7,023 notes
Apr 17th
26,222 notes
Apr 17th
2 notes
Socialism: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbour.
Communism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
Fascism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
Nazism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..
Traditional Capitalism: You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. You herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
An American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow dropped dead.
A French Corporation: You have 2 cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
Japanese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them Worldwide.
An Italian Corporation: You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows. None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
Chinese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
An Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you and they bomb your arse. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.......
Counter Culture: 'Wow, dig it, like there's these 2 cows, man, grazing in the hemp field. You gotta have some of this milk!'
Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
Fatalist: You have 2 doomed cows...
A West-Country Corporation: You have 2 cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
A Brazilian Corporation: You have 2 cows. You pay taxes for 6 cows. You have to sell one cow in order to pay the taxes. Your remaining cow gets sick and dies while waiting for availability in the public vet hospital.
Moffat: You have two cows. Both of them are your daughters time travelling from the past where they had a brief love affair with Da Vinci making you the rightful Queen of England.
A New Zealand Corporation: You don't only have cows, you have sheep as well. In fact - you have more sheep and cows than people, and they're all farmed by hobbits.
Apr 15th
254,320 notes
Apr 12th
45 notes
2 tags
Apr 8th
4 notes
2 tags
“If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want...”
– Albert Einstein
Apr 7th
2 notes
Apr 7th
10,495 notes
Apr 7th
6,876 notes
Apr 6th
Apr 5th
49 notes
Apr 5th
284 notes
Apr 1st
2,043 notes
March 2012
22 posts
It’s okay, no one will notice.
Mar 26th
Mar 25th
1,365 notes
Mar 24th
4,184 notes